It’s New Year's and if you are a human being with a pulse this means that you’re probably being bombarded with “New Year, New You” messages. You know the ones — glossy magazine headlines telling us to make resolutions to repent for the holiday glut, advertisements for gym membership discounts, and co-workers talking about their diets. Here’s what I think about all that - it’s bullshit. Don’t read those glossy magazine covers, don’t fall for those gym membership ads, and if your coworker starts telling you about their diet, just start humming really loudly. All that New Year diet resolution business is toxic. The message is meant to make you feel bad about yourself and besides there is plenty of research out there to prove that diets don’t work. To counter all the body-shaming New Year diet crap out there, I’ve decided to post Lindy West’s article from this past summer “My Wedding Was Perfect And I Was Fat As Hell The Whole Time.” West is a Seattle-based fat rights activist, writer extroardinaire, editor and performer. I recently read this article and I found it inspiring and beautiful.
If you are a person who lives in a fat body, or a body that is not defined as beautiful by mainstream culture, or if you have ever felt like you were not enough in some way (or that you had to be different in order to be happy) I think Lindy West’s words will resonate with you. West’s message is a vital one. It counters the mainstream fat-shaming world that says women have to be thin to be brides and that people need to lose weight for their wedding. I’ve heard so many people (some are individuals I know and like and think have good lefty politics) make comments about wanting to lose weight for a wedding or other event. Fuck. That. Shit. Be yourself, live in the body that is yours. Don’t wait ’til you are thinner to live your life. If you do, your life will pass you by and you will hate yourself in the process.
Also— being fat or “overweight” does not mean someone is unhealthy. It’s high time we uncouple the notion of what it means to be healthy from body size. Studies now show that being “overweight” (having a BMI between 25 and 30) is less associated with mortality than being “underweight” or even a “normal” weight. Read this article for the proof! (And here’s the Journal of American Medical Association article if you’re in the mood for something a little more academic). Also— so much more goes into being “healthy” than just diet, exercise, and body shape. That’s just one small sliver of health. What about social and emotional health? Having a strong social support network? Getting enough sleep and rest? Playing? Making art? These all factor into one’s overall health, but the world we live in puts way too much of an emphasis on body size, eating and exercise habits when determining what it means to be “healthy.”
This is my favorite quotation in West’s article:
“When I think back on my teenage self, what I really needed to hear wasn’t that someone might love me one day if I lost enough weight to qualify as human – it was that I was worthy of love now, just as I was.”
I think this is a message that we all need to hear again and again and again: You are worthy of love right now, just as you are, and you are enough. You don't need to change in order to be happy, you don't need to make six figures, or get married, or be in a relationship, or "get your shit together,” or meet all your New Year’s resolutions, and you certainly don't need to lose weight or change your appearance. You are beautiful just the way you are. Happy 2016!
If you are a person who lives in a fat body, or a body that is not defined as beautiful by mainstream culture, or if you have ever felt like you were not enough in some way (or that you had to be different in order to be happy) I think Lindy West’s words will resonate with you. West’s message is a vital one. It counters the mainstream fat-shaming world that says women have to be thin to be brides and that people need to lose weight for their wedding. I’ve heard so many people (some are individuals I know and like and think have good lefty politics) make comments about wanting to lose weight for a wedding or other event. Fuck. That. Shit. Be yourself, live in the body that is yours. Don’t wait ’til you are thinner to live your life. If you do, your life will pass you by and you will hate yourself in the process.
Also— being fat or “overweight” does not mean someone is unhealthy. It’s high time we uncouple the notion of what it means to be healthy from body size. Studies now show that being “overweight” (having a BMI between 25 and 30) is less associated with mortality than being “underweight” or even a “normal” weight. Read this article for the proof! (And here’s the Journal of American Medical Association article if you’re in the mood for something a little more academic). Also— so much more goes into being “healthy” than just diet, exercise, and body shape. That’s just one small sliver of health. What about social and emotional health? Having a strong social support network? Getting enough sleep and rest? Playing? Making art? These all factor into one’s overall health, but the world we live in puts way too much of an emphasis on body size, eating and exercise habits when determining what it means to be “healthy.”
This is my favorite quotation in West’s article:
“When I think back on my teenage self, what I really needed to hear wasn’t that someone might love me one day if I lost enough weight to qualify as human – it was that I was worthy of love now, just as I was.”
I think this is a message that we all need to hear again and again and again: You are worthy of love right now, just as you are, and you are enough. You don't need to change in order to be happy, you don't need to make six figures, or get married, or be in a relationship, or "get your shit together,” or meet all your New Year’s resolutions, and you certainly don't need to lose weight or change your appearance. You are beautiful just the way you are. Happy 2016!
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